"JUST MARRIED"
(2003) (Ashton Kutcher, Brittany Murphy) (PG-13)

Alcohol/ Drugs	Blood/Gore	Disrespectful/ Bad Attitude	Frightening/ Tense Scenes	Guns/ Weapons
Heavy	Mild	*Heavy	Minor	None
Imitative Behavior	Jump Scenes	Music (Scary/Tense)	Music (Inappropriate)	Profanity
Moderate	None	None	None	*Heavy
Sex/ Nudity	Smoking	Tense Family Scenes	Topics To Talk About	Violence
Heavy	Minor	Mild	Mild	Moderate

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QUICK TAKE:

Romantic Comedy: A newly married couple's honeymoon goes wrong in all sorts of ways.

PLOT:

Tom Leezak (ASHTON KUTCHER) and Sarah McNerney (BRITTANY MURPHY) couldn't be more different. He's an unrefined, late-night radio traffic reporter who hangs out with his buddy Kyle (DAVID MOSCOW) and enjoys driving his vintage muscle car. She works at Sotheby's and comes from an ultra-wealthy family.

Yet, as is often the case, they meet and fall in love. Much to the dismay of her parents (DAVID RASCHE & VERONICA CARTWRIGHT) and siblings including Lauren (MONÉT MAZUR), the two get married and head off to Europe for their honeymoon.

From that point on, they must contend with one comically disastrous mishap after another. That includes the appearance of Sarah's ex-beau, Peter Prentiss (CHRISTIAN KANE) who may or may not be pursuing her, and Sarah's belief that Tom's hooked up with bar-hopper Wendy (VALERIA).

WILL KIDS WANT TO SEE IT?

If they're fans of romantic comedies or someone in the cast, they just might.

WHY THE MPAA RATED IT: PG-13

For sexual content, some crude humor and a brief drug reference.

CAST AS ROLE MODELS:

ASHTON KUTCHER plays the groom who sleeps with Sarah before marrying her, uses some profanity, is enticed by the thought of sleeping with Wendy and is jealous about Peter's presence on his honeymoon.

BRITTANY MURPHY plays the bride who slept with Peter and Tom in the past, and wants to consummate her marriage to Tom. She becomes irritated by what occurs during their honeymoon and uses some profanity.

CHRISTIAN KANE plays Sarah's successful former beau who slept with her in the past and is still after her despite her being on her honeymoon.

MONÉT MAZUR plays Sarah's sister who doesn't approve of her marriage to Tom.

DAVID RASCHE and VERONICA CARTWRIGHT play their parents who fall into the same boat.

DAVID MOSCOW plays Tom's best friend who tries to help him through his predicament.

VALERIA plays a woman in an Italian bar who wants to have sex with Tom.

CAST, CREW, & TECHNICAL INFO

HOW OTHERS RATED THIS MOVIE

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Curious if this title is entertaining, any good, and/or has any artistic merit?
Then read OUR TAKE of this film.

(Note: The "Our Take" review of this title examines the film's artistic merits and does not take into account any of the possibly objectionable material listed below).

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OUR WORD TO PARENTS:

Here's a brief summary of the content found in this comedy that's been rated PG-13. Profanity consists of at least 3 "s" words along with several slang terms for female genitalia used here as a woman's first name. Other expletives and colorful phrases are also uttered.

A great deal of sexually related dialogue is present, as is some comedy style making out (with implied or attempted sex, but nothing explicit is seen). A woman wants to have sex with a stranger and partially disrobes (we see her bare back) but nothing else happens, a visual joke is made about a vibrator-like device, and the sounds of a sexual encounter are heard.

A moderate amount of comedy-style violence (slapstick and comic thrashing or hitting of items and people, as well as the off-screen death of a dog) is present, as are varying forms of imitative behavior. Various characters have varying degrees of bad attitudes, a brief drug reference is made, and some crude humor is present. Meanwhile, various characters smoke, more drink (some to the point of intoxication) and various comments are made about drinking.

Should you still be concerned about the film's appropriateness for yourself or anyone else in your home, you may want to look more closely at our detailed listings for more specific information regarding the film's content.

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ALCOHOL OR DRUG USE

When Tom returns to his place, he finds Kyle apparently passed out (with beer containers around him), and a message on the answering machine that comments on "Budweiser therapy" to get over Sarah.

Tom and Sarah have beer.

Sarah's family and Tom have a champagne toast.

Sarah's dad and a priest have drinks.

Sarah states that she drank too much in the past and ended up sleeping with Peter.

Tom and Sarah have champagne on a plane.

Sarah asks Tom if he wants to get drunk and make out and he replies that there's not enough there (in the small bottle) to get him drunk.

Sarah states that honeymoons are supposed to be all champagne and other things.

Tom and Sarah have champagne in their room.

Sarah and Tom receive a bottle of Cognac from Peter, but don't have any.

Sarah comments on Hemmingway having a singe malt in Venice.

People have drinks in a bar where Tom has a beer.

Sarah has champagne while driven to an estate belonging to an associate of Peter's where all three have drinks and Sarah ends up a bit intoxicated (Peter even tells her she should switch to water).

Tom has more beer.

Tom drinks.

While mad at Tom, Sarah jokingly tells airport officials, "My husband has two pounds of hash hidden in his rectum."

Kyle tells Tom that breakfast beer is a must.

Tom's father has a beer.

BLOOD/GORE

Sarah suddenly has a little bit of a bloody nose (we later see her and Tom with pieces of tissue stuck up their nostrils from more unseen nosebleeds).

Sarah and Tom walk in on a kid seated and using the bathroom in a plane. They then go to another bathroom and react to the smell when a disheveled and sweaty man exits and complains about Mexican food. Once inside, his foot ends up stuck in the toilet and is then covered with the blue flushing goo.

Tom makes a comment about his "morning dump."

As an older woman leads Sarah and Tom up some stairs to their room, she repeatedly farts and the two try to contain their laughter.

While mad at Tom, Sarah jokingly tells airport officials, "My husband has two pounds of hash hidden in his rectum." We then see him walking and later sitting gingerly indicating he had a full cavity search.

DISRESPECTFUL/BAD ATTITUDE

Everything listed her is played for comedy.

Tom and Sarah are mean to each other (in a comedy fashion) at the beginning of the film, with him purposefully bumping into her so that she runs into another person; she throwing her gum into his hair and him rolling a luggage cart at her feet that causes her to fall at the bottom of an escalator.

Tom lies to Sarah about the circumstances around her dog's death (and then lies about lying).

Most of Sarah's family doesn't like Tom and don't attempt to hide their feelings (the father refers to him as a "Pollock" and later calls him a "cracker").

Peter playfully refers to some other male players in a game of backyard football as "girls."

Tom and a European hotel manager/owner have bad attitudes toward each other (with Tom complaining that they should have things written in "American" in the rooms).

Sarah lies to Peter about where Tom is.

Peter pays a hotel maitre d' to follow Sarah's every move and keeps after her despite her being married.

Sarah admits to sleeping with Peter after she started dating Tom.

Some viewers might be offended by a stereotypical portrayal of an Asian man (with accent and shouting, etc.).

FRIGHTENING SCENES

For those who don't like violence against animals, Tom throws a ball that accidentally bounces out a window, causing Sarah's dog to leap after it. We hear the sound of a crashing car and then hear that the dog was killed (but we never see the death or impact).

For those who don't like bugs, there's a scene where Tom and Sarah are in bed and a large cockroach runs across his neck and face.

GUNS/WEAPONS

None.

IMITATIVE BEHAVIOR

Phrases: "Get your sh*t, let's go," "Sh*tty," "Sh*t-canning," "Get that junk wagon out of here," "Sucked," "Fat head," "Are you ready to get your ass kicked today?" "You bet your ass," "Pollock," "Are you girls ready for this?" (what one guy asks others), "Chicks" (woman), "Shut up," "Bitch" (said by a kid to Sarah when she walks in on him in a bathroom), "Crapper," "Morning dump," "We're paying out the ass for it," "Stupid American pig," "Jockstrap" (what Tom calls another man), "Jackass," "Oh, crap," "Cracker" (what Sarah's father calls Tom), "Silly ass," "Ass bag," "Loser," "Piss" (urinate), "You slut," "Don't make me break my foot off in your ass," "That's damn straight" and "What the hell is this?"

Tom and Sarah are mean to each other (in a comedy fashion) at the beginning of the film, with him purposefully bumping into her so that she runs into another person; she throwing her gum into his hair and him rolling a luggage cart at her feet that causes her to fall at the bottom of an escalator.

Tom throws a ball that accidentally bounces out a window, causing Sarah's dog to leap after it.

We see a flashback of Tom and another young boy holding toy "Star Wars" light sabers at their crotches like erect penises and thrashing them about.

Tom and Sarah attempt to have sex in an airplane bathroom.

A woman gives Tom "the finger."

Sarah wears a midriff-revealing top.

JUMP SCENES

None.

MUSIC (SCARY/TENSE)

None.

MUSIC (INAPPROPRIATE)

None.

PROFANITY

At least 3 "s" words, 5 slang terms for female genitals ("p*ssy") used as a woman's first name, 1 slang term for male genitals ("wiener"), 1 slang term for sex ("hook up"), 1 slang term for breasts ("boobies"), 10 asses, 4 hells, 2 craps, 2 damns, 1 S.O.B., 6 uses of "Oh my God," 3 of "Oh God," 2 of "G-damn," and 1 use each of "For Christ's sakes," "Jesus" and "Sweet Lord" as exclamations.

SEX/NUDITY

A running gag revolves around Sarah's mom's name being "Pussy," so that's used in various scenes for laughs.

Tom purposefully bumps into Sarah so that she runs into another person who spills his coffee down her front (and we see her bra and cleavage as she pulls her shirt down).

While mad at Sarah at the end of their honeymoon (and after she says she's coming over to his place to move out her things), Tom yells at her to call first since he might be having sex with a complete stranger.

Sarah shows more cleavage while bent over and in several other scenes (including in her low-cut wedding dress where we see the tops of her bare breasts).

After some flirting, Tom and Sarah passionately make out against a wall. He then gets on top of her on the bed and they start removing some clothing (with implied sex). The next morning, he gets up and has just a sheet or something like that around him.

Tom sneaks into Sarah's bedroom (in her parents' house) wearing just boxers and a tank-top. Nothing happens, however, as her father walks in and Tom hides.

At Tom's wedding, Kyle (the best man) asks him if he's sure he wants to give up his "grazing rights." A rhetorical question is made about being happily married to Sarah or having 50 one-night stands. Kyle then asks Tom if there are any "chicks you didn't have that you wish you had." He then asks whether Sarah ever "hooked up" with Peter and then incredulously asks, "You're getting married and she didn't share the roster?" We then see a flashback of her listing the guy's she slept with while lying in bed with Tom, but she doesn't answer about Peter.

Sarah's sister tells her that she (Sarah) could have had Peter and Sarah then says that she did (sexually) and that it wasn't that hot. She states that she drank too much and that they then "tussled."

In their honeymoon suite, Tom lies Sarah down on the bed (in her wedding dress) and asks if she feels like "it." She says that she's tired, but then seems upset and states that it's their wedding night and they don't want to have sex. She then cries and says that tomorrow her parents will know she's not a virgin anymore. He reminds her that she hasn't been a virgin since college. She says that she knows that, but they'll know for sure and will realize that he's the one who deflowered her. He then tells her that they have their entire lives to have sex and that it's okay if they don't do it tonight. She then suddenly says that she kind of feels like it and they passionately kiss, but she then has a bloody nose and nothing else happens.

We see a flashback of Tom and another young boy holding toy "Star Wars" light sabers at their crotches like erect penises and thrashing them about.

While onboard a plane headed for their European honeymoon, Sarah tells Tom that she can't wait and suggestively looks at him. They then try to find an empty bathroom and eventually do. Once inside, they start playfully kissing, but turbulence and a pesky flight attendant stop them from getting very far.

On their honeymoon, Tom discovers that Sarah has brought along the "Thunderstick A200." It's apparently a vibrator (we only partially and briefly see it), and she reminds telling him about "that night in college." He says he wasn't aware of the hardware and she playfully asks, "Getting a visual?" He then goes to plug it into the wall, but gets a shock and nothing else sexual happens (and we see it sticking out from the plug).

After she asks him if he wants to get drunk and make out, Tom and Sarah end up doing the latter in a parked car while stuck in a snow drift. The camera pans up and we don't know what else happens.

We see Sarah with her legs wrapped around Tom's waist as he stands (both are clothed).

Sarah states that honeymoons are supposed to be all champagne, room service and love-making and then complains that they haven't made love.

Upset about where they're staying in Venice, Sarah asks Tom if he has "four men staring at your boobies right now?"

Tom and Sarah playfully kiss and she removes his coat. As they giggle and make out, they spin around and fall through their room's wall and land on another couple's bed (the man is shirtless). The man first looks upset and then gives them an enticing look. The scene jumps through time and we hear sexual sounds (rhythmic bed ones and male and female pleasured ones) as Sarah and Tom listen while in their bed (with plastic just covering the large hole in the wall between the rooms). They then ask, "Should we show them how it's done?" They start kissing, but a cockroach then crawls across his neck and face and nothing else sexual occurs.

After some more fighting, Tom says that maybe they should just have sex. Sarah replies, "Call me crazy, but I'm just not in the mood to make love." He then complains that they haven't made love since they were married. She tells him that they'll go sightseeing tomorrow, he replies "Fine" and a comment is then made that they'll then have sex.

Sarah finally admits to Tom that she slept with Peter. He then says that he needs to know every detail, including how small his "wiener" was.

A woman in a bar wants to go back with Tom to either of their rooms and then makes a nonsexual sound as a replacement for saying sex. She also mentions that the cute conversation and air humping is going nowhere. Tom then tries to escape from her (by crawling out a bathroom window), but ends up running into her again and she still wants to have sex. They end up going back to the hotel that both are staying in and she coyly wants to go into his room to use the phone. Once inside, she pushes him backwards, passionately kisses him and has her legs around him. She then lands on top of him on the bed where she slaps him (in a sexual manner) and then removes her top and bra (we see her from behind and thus see her bare back). He says he's on his honeymoon and the sexual element ends there (although we see her leave while holding a shirt over her bare chest). Sarah later finds that woman's lacy bra and sarcastically comments that it goes with her red panties.

We see Tom in just his boxers.

Tom accuses Peter of showing up on their honeymoon and trying to have sex with his wife.

While mad at Tom, Sarah jokingly tells airport officials, "My husband has two pounds of hash hidden in his rectum." We then see him walking gingerly indicating he had a full cavity search. He then angrily tells Sarah that the first sex he had on his honeymoon was with a man named Santino (meaning the person who searched him which isn't seen).

Sarah and Tom argue some more and she says she hopes he used a rubber. He says he didn't since it didn't get that far. He then says he hoped Peter did and she sarcastically says that they don't make condoms that big.

SMOKING

Several miscellaneous people smoke.

TENSE FAMILY SCENES

Tom and Sarah's marriage is rocky from time to time (usually in a comedic fashion).

TOPICS TO TALK ABOUT

Working through relationship problems.

The comment that you never see the hard days in a photo album, but those are the ones that get you from one happy snapshot to the next.

Unmarried couples living together.

VIOLENCE

Tom and Sarah are mean to each other (in a comedy fashion) at the beginning of the film, with him purposefully bumping into her so that she runs into another person; she throwing her gum into his hair and him rolling a luggage cart at her feet that causes her to fall at the bottom of an escalator.

While mad at Sarah, Tom purposefully drives his car around the circle so that he runs over and smashes various stone planters.

Tom smashes his answering machine when he hears a message from Peter on it.

Tom throws a football that accidentally hits Sarah on the head and knocks her to the beach.

Tom throws a ball that accidentally bounces out a window, causing Sarah's dog to leap after it. We hear the sound of a crashing car and then hear that the dog was killed (but we never see the death or impact).

One of Sarah's brothers purposefully runs into Tom quite hard while playing backyard football and sends him to the ground.

While carrying her across the threshold of their honeymoon suite, Tom accidentally bangs Sarah's head on the door.

Sarah accidentally hits Tom on the face in bed.

An airplane bathroom door flings open and accidentally hits a flight attendant on the nose, knocking her backwards.

Tom is accidentally shocked and knocked backwards when trying to plug in a 110-volt device into a European outlet.

Tom accidentally yanks the steering wheel off a rental car.

Trying to get the attention of a passing car, Tom throws a snowball at it. The driver then stops, backs up and drives her car backwards into their parked car, sending it over a precipice (with no one inside, but we later see it severely damaged).

Sarah accidentally trips over a painter and his easel.

A woman kicks Tom after learning that he's on his honeymoon (and she thought they were going to have sex).

Sarah slaps Peter on the face when he suddenly kisses her.

Tom throws something against the wall that shatters. Sarah then throws a heavy ashtray at Tom that hits him on the head and sends him to the floor. He then uses a fireplace poker to smash a lamp and then threatens Peter (whom he believes is trying to steal Sarah from him). He then chases Peter through the hotel with the poker that he swings at him. This leads outside where Tom throws the poker that breaks some glass in a car.

Tom attempts to ram a gate with his car, but ends up only damaging the front end of his car.

Reviewed January 1, 2003 / Posted January 10, 2003

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