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QUICK TAKE:
Horror: Prehistoric piranhas are let loose from a subterranean lake cavern and subsequently feast on nearby college kids on spring break.
PLOT:
Seismic activity opens an undersea cavern that unleashes thousands of prehistoric, flesh-eating piranhas. Their first victim is a local fisherman named Matt (RICHARD DREYFUSS). The fish then next turn their attention to the hundreds of spring-breakers who have descended on a nearby Arizona resort town protected by Sheriff Julie Forester (ELISABETH SHUE) and Deputy Fallon (VING RHAMES).
Julie is the mother to teenager Jake (STEVEN R. McQUEEN), who is recruited by a "Girls Gone Wild" videographer Derrick (JERRY O'CONNELL) to guide him to where all of the local sites are where promiscuous girls party and swim. Jake is attracted to Derrick's main performers, Danni (KELLY BROOK) and Crystal (RILEY STEELE), but also loves local girl, Kelly (JESSICA SZOHR). Meanwhile, local fish expert Mr. Goodman (CHRISTOPHER LLOYD) determines the origins of this particular breed of piranha and fears for the local population.
When the piranha attack, Jake, Kelly, Derrick and his crew are isolated and swarmed by the killer fish. Julie and Fallon try and help the hundreds of partiers under siege at the marina. And Julie's two pre-teen kids Laura and Zane (BROOKLYNN PROULX and SAGE RYAN) disobey Jake, who is supposed to be babysitting them, and take a boat out onto the lake to fish.
OUR TAKE: 6 out of 10
Our reviewing policy for films that aren't shown in advance to critics is that we'll only provide a paragraph or two about the film's artistic merits.
The only people who will be disappointed by "Piranha 3D" are those unfortunate souls who buy a ticket and go in looking for a cohesive plot, compelling characters, and a sense of moral and thematic ambiguity. Those who go in craving blood, gore, breasts, and Ving Rhames going medieval on a school of prehistoric, flesh-eating piranha are going to leave the theater with big, silly grins on their faces.
This is bad-for-you filmmaking at its best, folks. It's one of those movies you walk out of marveling, "THAT got an R rating?!" There is something to be said for delivering exactly what is promised in the commercials and trailers, and that something is good, old-fashioned B-movie thrills -- albeit with the latest digital gore effects and 3-D gimmickry.
In addition to a supporting cast of scantily clad, twentysomething fugitives from the CW network, the film also reaches out to older moviegoers by casting such Generation X favorites as Elisabeth Shue as a local sheriff, Rhames as her faithful deputy, Christopher Lloyd as the local piranha expert, and Richard Dreyfuss tweaking his "Jaws" role of Matt Hooper in an early cameo.
It's not Merchant-Ivory, but it's efficient and reasonably well made. I give it a 6 out of 10. (T. Durgin)
![[Screen It]](/images/underground_header.jpg)