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"MISS MARCH"
(2009) (Zach Cregger, Trevor Moore) (R)

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QUICK TAKE:
Comedy: Waking up from a four-year coma, a young man and his best friend set out on a cross-country road trip headed for the Playboy mansion to find his former girlfriend who's now a Playboy Playmate.
PLOT:
High school students Eugene Bell (ZACH CREGGER) and Tucker Cleigh (TREVOR MOORE) have been friends since they were little kids. Yet, while Tucker is sexually experienced -- thanks to his early exposure to Playboy magazine -- Eugene is still a virgin. He does have a girlfriend of two and a half years in Cindi Whitehall (RAQUEL ALESSI), and despite them giving abstinence speeches to middle school students, she's ready to have sex with him.

But after drinking with Tucker at a post-prom party to get up the nerve to go through with that, Eugene goes through the wrong door, falls down the steps, and is knocked into a coma. Four years later, Tucker manages to rouse him from that, informing his friend that he's now having sex with former classmate Candace (MOLLY STANTON), while Cindi has gone on to become a Playboy Playmate.

With Eugene wanting to find her, and Tucker wanting to realize his lifelong dream of meeting Hugh Hefner (HUGH HEFNER), they set out on a cross-country road trip to get to the Playboy mansion, receiving help from the likes of rapper Horsed*ck.MPEG (CRAIG ROBINSON) and two foreign lesbians, Katja (ALEXIS RABEN) and Vonka (EVE MAURO), to get them there.

OUR TAKE: 2 out of 10
Our reviewing policy for films that aren't shown in advance to critics (or are done so late the night before they open) is that we'll only provide a paragraph or two about the film's artistic merits or, more accurately, lack thereof. After all, life is too short to spend any more effort than that on a movie that even the releasing studio knows isn't any good (which is why they hid it from reviewers before its release).

Aimed at adolescently minded males, this is yet another road trip meets sex comedy offering, topped off with the usual array of gross-out, crude humor. While there is a smattering of laughs to be had - mostly of the idiotic and/or guilty pleasure variety - for the most part this isn't a terribly well-made film, even for one of its genre and accompanying lowered expectations.

Perhaps writer/directors/stars Zach Cregger and Trevor Moore should have removed one of those hats as they don't excel in any of those specific or collective fields. Instead, they rely on the usual genre stand-bys as well as a number of running gags that quickly wear out their welcome. Good for a handful of chuckles, but nothing more, "Miss March" isn't worth the spread it's received. It rates as a 2 out of 10.




Reviewed March 12, 2009 / Posted March 13, 2009


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