Isn't it interesting how people use animal types as adjectives and nouns to describe themselves or other people? Perhaps it's due to their close association and/or proximity to humans throughout the ages or perhaps us sensing or projecting human-like characteristics on them.
Whatever the case, the list is seemingly endless. People can be dog-tired or the cat's meow. Some might be hawks or the bee's knees, while those who consume too much are sometimes known as pigs. Those who can't be trusted are snakes, spies are known as moles, lemmings will blindly follow other into dire situations, and guinea pigs are those who end up on the wrong side of what's usually an unfavorable experiment.
The latter is based on such rodents that -- when not sold in pet stores to children not quite ready for the added duties of caring for a cat or dog -- are often being used for research or experimentation. Such is the case in the movie "G-Force," but before animal rights activists contemplate gathering protests, it should be pointed out that the small critters are the heroes of what's yet another entry in the talking animals comedy genre.
That doesn't mean that there shouldn't be concern about the likely post-movie surge of guinea pig adoptions, which is a legitimate worry as the same has occurred with other such animal-based flicks where kids end up disappointed that their new pets don't behave the way they did in the movie. Namely, that would not only be talking, but also acting as miniature agents of espionage, just as handy with gizmos and gadgets as they are with various wise-cracks.
Then again, that worry might be unfounded as this busy action comedy is so bland and boring, and the jokes utterly flat when not doing lame riffs on popular movie quotes that kids might be too uninvolved to parrot their kid predecessors in lionizing the critters as the next big pet thing.
In fact, you know you're in trouble when the big selling point for such a film is that it's the first 3-D offering from Jerry Bruckheimer. If that name doesn't ring a bell, he's one of the most successful movie producers in the history of the cinema who's also parlayed that success onto the small screen through a bevy of TV shows. It would appear that Disney (that has a seemingly insurmountable lead in talking animal projects) realized the pic wasn't terribly special and thus opted for the unique promotional tack touting the producer and the 3-D effects.
If anything, he's created something of a class reunion here, from some of the vocal talent (including Nicolas Cage) to those behind the camera (such as newbie director Hoyt H. Yeatman Jr. and screenwriters Marianne & Cormac Wimberley who all worked in different capacities on Bruckheimer's "National Treasure" films)
While Yeatman might have made his mark in the movie FX field (mainly as the visual effects supervisor), and that would seem a good fit for all of the computer effects here mixed with the 3-D visuals, little of the effort is engaging. And that goes beyond the busy action sequences and segues into the main story and various characters.
In short, we don't care about any of that (although viewer involvement might be inversely proportional to one's age), especially when the film unexpectedly ends up turning into "Transformers 2.5" where household products come to life and one towering one ends up assembled from all sorts of related gear and such.
Vocal work is fine if unremarkable and is yet another case where the celebrity involvement (Cage, Penelope Cruz, Tracy Morgan, Sam Rockwell, Jon Favreau) easily could have been handled by lesser known vocal talent (who need the work) with absolutely no ill effect on the final product. On the human side, Zach Galifianakis proves he isn't terribly interesting when he's not dealing with a "Hangover," while Will Arnett and especially Bill Nighy are wasted in what are basically caricature roles.
I understand and appreciate the motivation behind trying to mix the standard talking animal thrust with some "Spy Kids" type material to draw in and entertain the kids. I just wish it was done in a more imaginative and engaging fashion than what's presented here. When one character apes the famous Indiana Jones line with "Dogs, why does it always have to be dogs?" all I could think was that such a canine adjective was all too appropriate for this offering. "G-Force" rates as a 2.5 out of 10.
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