One man was an egotistical visionary who commanded a large army in his quest to bring the world together under his rule, no matter the casualty rate. Another could be described in similar terms, although the "armies" he's controlled have been much smaller, his desire is to enlighten or provoke those around the world and any resultant bloodshed is limited to what's spilled on the big screen.
How appropriate then that the latter, director Oliver Stone, is now directing a big budget adaptation of the life and times of Alexander the Great in the appropriately titled "Alexander." No stranger to autobiographical works of prominent figures -- such as the title ones who appeared in "JFK" and "Nixon" -- or the resultant controversies surrounding his vision and interpretation of them and their places in history, Stone jumps headfirst into the melee with this nearly three-hour effort.
Since his title subject has been dead for thousands of years and there obviously isn't as much recorded information about him as compared to those who followed him much, much later, the controversy will likely be less about the movie's facts (although the overall gay/bisexual angle is generating some heat) than in what happened to Stone's filmmaking prowess.
Yes, the director who once helmed the likes of "Salvador," "Platoon" and "Wall Street" has delivered -- along with co-writers Christopher Klye ("K19: The Widowmaker," "The Weight of Water") and Laeta Kalogridis ("X-Men," "Scream 3") -- what's arguably one of, if not the weakest film of his career. Bloated, miscast, poorly edited, overlong, messy and simply not terribly engaging, this could be a textbook example of how not to make a big-budget biopic.
From the opening scene that's all too obviously located on a set to the boring battle sequences, melodrama and dialogue that's downright hokey when not clunky, overwrought or too obvious, there are too many things that are mediocre to bad about the film for it to have a fighting chance of succeeding.
Aside from the directorial blemishes and problems that permeate the film from start to finish, the film's biggest error is with its casting. While Colin Farrell ("Phone Booth," "S.W.A.T.") is a gifted and charismatic actor, I simply didn't buy him as the title character. With his blond wig and visually short appearance, I kept getting a Barney Rubble vibe from Farrell's performance, although the constantly alternating and/or mix of Irish and American accents reminded me of neither Bedrock nor ancient Greece. Nor is the performance as good or riveting as that from the likes of Russell Crowe in "Gladiator," a far superior, more engaging and more believable "swords and sandals" epic.
Val Kilmer ("Wonderland," "The Salton Sea") is decent if underused as Alexander's one-eyed father (the makeup artist must have received a great deal on closed-eye scar patches as many characters beyond Kilmer's sport near identical ones), while Jared Leto ("Panic Room," "Requiem for a Dream") is fine as Alexander's friend, soldier and lover (although the excessive eye liner to make him appear more effeminate is a bit much). Christopher Plummer ("Nicholas Nickleby," "The Sound of Music") isn't around long enough to make much of an impression as notable historical figure Aristotle, while Anthony Hopkins ("The Human Stain," "The Silence of the Lambs") is wasted playing the film's heard and occasionally seen narrator who's recounting the title character's life to us.
As far as the females are concerned, Rosario Dawson ("The Rundown," "Men in Black 2") is miscast and flat as Alexander's fiery commoner wife, but the film's guilty pleasure by far arrives in the form of Angelina Jolie ("Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow," the "Lara Croft" films). Seemingly channeling Norma Desmond, Elvira and any garden variety carnival snake handler, the actress and her bizarre Russian-sounding accent are a vampy hoot from start to finish. Unfortunately, the film isn't about her nor is it a comedy, although there are plenty of unintentional laughs, especially from a dialogue standpoint.
Most of the ingredients are present for an exciting epic. Yet, so many things are and/or go wrong in this film that you can't help but shake the inevitable "been there, seen that done so much better before" feeling that will likely come about while watching this messy, boring and far too long offering. "Alexander" rates as a 3.5 out of 10.
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