"KILLERS" (2010) (Ashton Kutcher, Katherine Heigl) (PG-13) Alcohol/ Drugs Blood/Gore Disrespectful/ Bad Attitude Frightening/ Tense Scenes Guns/ Weapons Extreme Moderate Heavy Moderate Extreme Imitative Behavior Jump Scenes Music (Scary/Tense) Music (Inappropriate) Profanity Heavy Moderate Moderate None Heavy Sex/ Nudity Smoking Tense Family Scenes Topics To Talk About Violence Heavy Minor Heavy Moderate Heavy QUICK TAKE: Action-comedy: A former assassin's quiet life as a married man in the suburbs is threatened when someone puts out a $20 million bounty on his life. PLOT: Spencer (ASHTON KUTCHER) is a government assassin, who hates his job and craves a normal life. He gets his chance when, on assignment in France, he meets a slightly neurotic American woman named Jen (KATHERINE HEIGL), who has just broken up with her boyfriend and is on holiday with her parents, the Kornfeldts (TOM SELLECK and CATHERINE O'HARA). Spencer's boss, Holbrook (MARTIN MULL), tries to convince Spencer to stay, telling him one never really leaves his line of work. But Spencer is adamant. Flash-forward three years, and Spencer and Jen are happily married, living in a big house, and surrounded by the usual assortment of suburban character types: Lily and Mac, a nerdy, young couple (ALEX BORSTEIN and KEVIN SUSSMAN); Henry, the boorish, overgrown frat boy (ROB RIGGLE); Vivian, his attractive co-worker (KATHERYN WINNICK); Olivia, a flirty housewife (LISA ANN WALTER); Kristen, the cynical best friend (CASEY WILSON); and so forth. Someone, though, puts out a hit on Spencer's life. He learns that there is a $20 million bounty on his head, and he is forced to tell Jen the truth. On the run, Jen and Spencer soon learn that pretty much all of their former friends and neighbors are "sleeper assassins" placed in close proximity to them just waiting to be "activated." On top of that, Jen is also cranky and nauseous, which can only mean one thing. She's pregnant. Can Mom and Dad help? Or are they assassins, too? WILL KIDS WANT TO SEE IT? Teens may be attracted because of the film's action elements and its two young leads. WHY THE MPAA RATED IT: PG-13 For violent action, sexual material, and language. CAST AS ROLE MODELS: ASHTON KUTCHER plays a former government assassin who has left the profession to marry a nice woman and live a quiet life in the suburbs. He is a violent man when pushed, claiming to have killed 15 people -- "all bad guys," he believes. He is a casual drinker. KATHERINE HEIGL plays his wife, a good-hearted, but often neurotic young woman who has a problem with spontaneity and moving out of her comfort zone. She is a casual drinker, who gets drunk early in the film on a date with Spencer. She casually swears throughout the film. TOM SELLECK plays her wealthy father, who is a former pilot and Marine. He has an active disdain for Spencer and can be quite domineering in that he believes there is a right way and a wrong way to do everything. Spencer comes to suspect that he may be an assassin, too. CATHERINE O'HARA plays Jen's mother, a boozy suburban housewife who literally drinks in pretty much every scene she appears in. MARTIN MULL plays Spencer's former boss, who gives him his assignments to kill people. He doesn't believe in having personal connections, advising Spencer to go have sex with models rather than pursue a meaningful relationship with Jen. He appears to be a casual smoker, too. ROB RIGGLE plays an uncouth co-worker of Spencer's, who often talks about sex. He turns out to be an assassin and tries to kill Spencer. KATHERYN WINNICK plays a co-worker of Spencer's who also turns out to be an assassin. ALEX BORSTEIN and KEVIN SUSSMAN play slightly nerdy neighbors of Jen and Spencer's, who also turn out to be assassins. LISA ANN WALTER plays a flirty neighbor of Jen and Spencer's who also turns out to be an assassin. CASEY WILSON plays a friend of Jen's who has a negative attitude towards marriage. She is a casual drinker and, yes, she also ends up being an assassin. CAST, CREW, & TECHNICAL INFO HOW OTHERS RATED THIS MOVIE Curious if this title is entertaining, any good, and/or has any artistic merit? Then read OUR TAKE of this film. (Note: The "Our Take" review of this title examines the film's artistic merits and does not take into account any of the possibly objectionable material listed below). OUR TAKE: 3 out of 10 Our reviewing policy for films that aren't shown in advance to critics is that we'll only provide a paragraph or two about the film's artistic merits. It's easy to see why Ashton Kutcher would want to produce and star in "Killers." He gets to play shoot-'em-up, pretending to be a government assassin who has become disillusioned with spy games, decides to "quit the life," and settle down with the gorgeous Katherine Heigl in suburbia. The problem is, the Kutch is never once believable in the role. The movie practically cries out for a Tom Cruise or Matt Damon in the lead. Both of those stars crafted smart, on-screen personas early in their careers, playing "best-of-the-best" type characters. Kutcher, by contrast, played the goof Kelso on "That '70s Show" and an equally dimwitted character in "Dude Where's My Car." No comparison. "Killers" feels like the TV movie version of its story, with its C-list cast (TV vets Tom Selleck, Martin Mull, and "Family Guy"-"MadTV" performer Alex Borstein lend support) and Stephen J. Cannell-esque stunts. It also turns spectacularly dumb in the end, with a twist that the cast and crew should literally break the fourth wall and beg you not to think about. I suspect there is a better chance at this kind of movie actually being watchable later this month with "Knight and Day," starring Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz. Save your money and wait 'til then. This one rates a 3 out of 10. (T. Durgin) ALCOHOL OR DRUG USE Mrs. Kornfeldt asks a flight attendant for "three Chardonnays," which her husband and daughter refuse but she tells the stewardess to bring anyway. Numerous hotel guests are shown drinking wine, cocktails, and other spirits around a hotel's pool area. Spencer and Jen have drinks at a nightclub. Jen drinks to excess and ends up getting drunk and subsequently passing out in a hotel room with Spencer. Spencer is shown having wine with a dinner. Mrs. Kornfeldt is shown drinking at a hotel breakfast. Mrs. Kornfeldt is shown drinking from a large pitcher of Bloody Mary mix in the morning. Spencer briefly mentions that Jen once told him a story about Cary Grant "dropping acid." Multiple attendees of Spencer's surprise birthday are shown consuming beer, wine, and various spirits. In the kitchen, we see at least a dozen bottles of whiskey and other liquors on a counter. One partygoer is shown leaving Spencer and Jen's party drunk, and we hear him falling down their front steps. Henry gets so drunk at Spencer's party that he passes out in his underwear on the living room couch and sleeps there for the night. Mrs. Kornfeldt is shown drinking a glass of wine. Mrs. Kornfeldt shows up at Jen and Spencer's house drinking from a cup. Since she has been drinking alcohol in every other scene she has appeared in throughout the film, it's safe to assume the cup also features some spirit. She later pours herself some wine into the cup. BLOOD/GORE When her mom gets on her for not being more adventurous and bungee jumping, Jen tells her she has a rule against vomiting in public -- a sentiment Spencer repeats later in the film. Henry breaks wind twice while sleeping on Spencer and Jen's couch. Both Henry and Spencer's faces are bloodied as a result of their violent fight in Spencer's house. Henry bleeds from a bullet wound in his arm. Holbrook is shown with bloody bullet wounds to the chest and head. As Spencer and Jen are attacked by multiple assassins throughout the middle part of the film, Jen says on several occasions she is either going to "puke" or "throw up." She actually does on one occasion, off-camera, but we can clearly hear her. Jen and Spencer have multiple discussions about her possibly being pregnant and needing to "pee on a stick" in order to confirm. She eventually buys a home pregnancy test, and we see her sitting on a toilet attempting to urinate on the test strip. Spencer bears a scrape wound behind his ear and red marks on his neck as a result of his fight with Vivian. Kristen yells out to Jen if she can come inside their house and "go Number one," meaning she needs to urinate. Spencer's face is mildly bruised as a result of the physical altercations he gets into with the various assassins. Lily has a bloody bullet wound after Spencer shoots her. Kristen is shot repeatedly by Mr. Kornfeldt, and we see her clothes ripped open with very brief blood spurts. DISRESPECTFUL/BAD ATTITUDE Spencer follows closely behind Jen, who he has just met, all the way from a hotel elevator, through a hotel, and out onto a beach and patio area of the resort. Spencer pretends he doesn't speak English when first wooing Jen. Jen lies to her father that she is not feeling well when she is really out buying a dress for her first date with Spencer. In France, Jen lies to Spencer that her father is a Russian pervert who came on to her on the plane ride over from the U.S. Spencer lies to Jen that he is a "corporate consultant." It is revealed that Jen bought a very expensive dress and only intended to wear it one night and then return it to the store for a refund. A smarmy nightclub customer comes on to Jen, assuming she is a prostitute. Spencer stays married to Jen for three years before circumstances force him to tell her he is a former assassin. Olivia openly flirts with Spencer at his birthday party with Jen and others nearby. Henry gets so drunk at Spencer's party that he passes out in his underwear on the living room couch and sleeps there for the night. Someone puts out a $20 million bounty on Spencer's life. It is soon revealed that nearly all of Spencer's neighbors and colleagues in suburbia are actually trained assassins waiting to be "activated" to kill him. Spencer and Jen steal a child's backpack. Spencer and Jen steal a car on at least two occasions. Olivia gives the middle-finger gesture. FRIGHTENING SCENES There are multiple sequences in which Spencer and Jen are attacked by assassins. Most of them are quite violent, but there is an element of light comedy running throughout each of the sequences as all of the killers are former friends and neighbors who look more like your standard suburban simpletons (an aging frat boy, an amorous housewife, a dweebish couple) than your usual hired movie henchmen. These attacks, detailed in the Violence and Guns/Weapons sections, may nevertheless be unsettling, suspenseful, or scary to younger viewers and/or those with low tolerance levels for such material. GUNS/WEAPONS On a yacht, a henchman pulls a rifle on Spencer. Spencer pulls out a big knife to cut the straps on Jen's dress and loosen it for her. Spencer and Mr. Kornfeldt shoot skeet with rifles. Mr. Kornfeldt is shown cleaning a disassembled rifle while talking on the phone. Spencer keeps a gun hidden in his office at work and multiple firearms hidden at his home. Spencer retrieves his handgun from his office and tucks it into his pants. He then almost pulls the gun out when he enters his house only to have the lights turn on and realize that he has walked into a surprise birthday party in his honor. As Spencer and Henry fight, Jen retrieves a handgun which she then uses to shoot Henry in the arm. Multiple bullets are shot into Spencer and Jen's house from an unseen assassin, forcing them to flee. Henry and Spencer exchange gunfire during a car chase. Henry wields an Uzi-like machine gun, while Spencer returns fire with his handgun. Vivian wields a gun as she tries to kill Spencer at his office, firing multiple shots. Jen attempts to shoot Vivian with her gun, but can't figure out the safety on the weapon. A delivery man pulls out a machine gun and fires multiple rounds in Spencer's direction in an attempt to kill him. Mac uses a high-powered rifle with a scope to shoot at Jen and Spencer. At a neighborhood carnival, a man is shown firing a toy rifle at objects in a shooting gallery. Mac and Lily enter Jen and Spencer's house, guns drawn looking to shoot and kill Spencer and collect the bounty. Kristen holds Mrs. Kornfeldt at gunpoint. Mr. Kornfeldt shoots Kristen, then shoots Lily. IMITATIVE BEHAVIOR Phrases: "I don't want to see you swat a f*cking fly!" "Sh*t!" "Is it stating, 'We like ugly sh*t?" "Balls" (testicles), "He had a womanly butt," "Go screw some models," "You go screw Pollyanna for a week," "Do you wanna poke Momma Bear?" "I think I just saw one of your balls roll by," "Call me the ball crusher from now on," "Remember when your balls were so swollen that I had to drive you to the clinic?" "We have to stop before this turns into a porno," "G-damn it!" "Darn it," "He's a weasel face," "It's rarely sexy to puke in public," "You can be pissed at me," "Nerds, they're my bread and butter" and "My cobbler sucks." Spencer drives at a high rate of speed through the streets of Nice, France. Spencer follows closely behind Jen, who he has just met, all the way from a hotel elevator, through a hotel, and out onto a beach and patio area of the resort. Spencer pretends he doesn't speak English when first wooing Jen. Jen lies to her father that she is not feeling well when she is really out buying a dress for her first date with Spencer. In France, Jen lies to Spencer that her father is a Russian pervert who came on to her on the plane ride over from the U.S. Spencer marries Jen without coming clean about his previous violent job. Jen adjusts her cleavage in a crowded nightclub. It is revealed that Jen bought a very expensive dress and only intended to wear it one night and then return it to the store for a refund. Jen talks with her mouth full of food. In a hurry, Spencer throws his SUV into reverse and drives through his home's closed garage door. Spencer and Jen steal a child's backpack. Spencer and Jen steal a car on at least two occasions. Olivia gives the middle-finger gesture. Spencer and Jen walk in the middle of a two-lane street at nighttime. JUMP SCENES Spencer walks into his darkened house only to have the lights turn on suddenly and his friends, family, and neighbors jump out and yell "Surprise!" As Vivian stalks Spencer with a gun in his office, Spencer suddenly busts through a section of weak dry wall and tries to manhandle the firearm away from her. Lily tries to run Spencer and Jen down in her SUV. At several points while Spencer and Jen are fleeing on foot, it appears they are just about to get run over. But she ends up crashing instead. MUSIC (SCARY/TENSE) A moderate amount of tense music occurs during some of the film's action sequences. MUSIC (INAPPROPRIATE) None. PROFANITY At least 1 "f" word, 4 "s" words, 3 slang terms for sex ("screw," "screwing" and "poke"), 1 slang term somewhat using female genitals ("p*say" but used as a James Bond character name), 2 hells, 1 damn, 2 uses each of "Oh my God" and "Oh God" and 1 use each of "For God's sake!" and "G-damn." SEX/NUDITY Mr. Kornfeldt recalls to Jen the first time he made love with her mother, adding that they "kept their seatbelts on." Jen's mom recalls her daughter's last boyfriend and says he had a "womanly butt." Spencer gets on an elevator shirtless and walks through a hotel and out onto a beach. Numerous women and men are shown in bikinis and swimsuits, many of them quite skimpy at a hotel spa. Jen lies to Spencer that her father is a "Russian pervert." Jen wears a very tight dress that gets her mistaken for a prostitute by at least one man. Jen adjusts her cleavage in a crowded nightclub. When Jen has trouble breathing in her tight dress, Spencer cuts the straps and loosens it, revealing some cleavage and prompting Jen to wrap herself in a blanket as Spencer turns away. Holbrook tells Spencer to go "screw some models" rather than get seriously involved with Jen. He later refers to Spencer's relationship with the woman as "screwing Polyanna." Jen and Spencer's first kiss is a long and lingering one. They later share an equally long kiss overlooking a sunset. As part of a romantic montage, Jen and Spencer go skinny dipping. We don't see any nudity. The camera just follows all of their articles of clothing strewn across a small beach and we see them nuzzling each other in the water. Lily tells Spencer that she and her husband are going to go "make love" after they finish passing out flyers. When Henry relates to Spencer a story of having sex on a floor with an attractive co-worker, Spencer replies, "You do realize that only happens in porn." Jen walks around her house in a bra showing cleavage. Jen and Spencer kiss and then begin to lay back across a desk and off-screen sex is implied. When Jen tells two female friends that Spencer is reluctant to go on a trip to France, one of them replies, "No vacation sex?" This same woman, Kristen, tells Jen that most couples get lax after three years of marriage and wonders if Jen has begun growing out "her down-there hair," implying her pubic hair. She then states that some marriages are at risk of the husband running off with a reality-TV star who speaks six languages, "one of them being sex." Later on, Kristen asks Jen if she is still having sex after three years of marriage. Jen replies, "All of the time." To which Kristen tells her to stop worrying about her relationship with Spencer. Olivia wears a tight blouse with much cleavage while hitting on Spencer at his birthday party. Henry is shown passed out in a shirt and underpants on Spencer and Jen's couch. Jen wears a nightgown that shows a considerable amount of cleavage. Spencer stops a long kiss with Jen in their driveway, saying they need to quit "before this turns into a porno." Spencer recalls a time when he had to drive Henry to a clinic because his "balls were swollen." When Jen asks Spencer how many people he has killed, he replies "15." She then asks if that is a real number or is it like when a woman tells a man how many men she has had sex with and should she "double it and multiply it by 10." Throughout most of the film's second half, Jen wears a low-hanging blouse that shows off her cleavage. Implying sex, Jen asks Spencer, "Do you wanna poke Momma Bear?" Jen refers to "naked Saturdays" with Spencer and commends him for being a "sure shot" after learning she is pregnant. When discussing the James Bond correlation, Jen says she is no "Pussy Galore." To which Spencer replies in the affirmative. Trying to get answers, Jen and Spencer log onto Henry's work computer and find lots of saved and bookmarked Internet pornography. We only see their expressions as the sites pop up. We don't see any on-screen sexual content. When mulling over Spencer's secret life, Jen chastises him for not having secrets like other people they know, then refers to some friend who hid "tranny porn" from his wife. SMOKING Holbrook is shown talking on a phone as smoke floats around him, implying that he is smoking. TENSE FAMILY SCENES Jen is an adult woman embarrassed to be traveling with her parents. On a date with Spencer, Jen hides under a table as her mother and father peruse a menu trying to decide whether or not they will eat at the restaurant where they are having their date. Mr. Kornfeldt has an active disdain for Spencer, his son-in-law. He is constantly looking at him with suspicion and is often cold to him in social situations. Jen discovers that Spencer has been keeping his past a secret from her for the first three years of their marriage. Once on the run, Jen believes the best course of action is to have her father help. But Spencer forbids her from going to him. Spencer comes to suspect Mr. Kornfeldt of either being an assassin or the one who has given the orders to have him killed, which causes friction between him and Jen. Spencer and Jen bicker in a store over Spencer's blown cover and the fact that she might be pregnant and that she doesn't know if she wants to stay in the marriage. Spencer blows up at Jen for having to be "always five minutes away" from Jen's mother and father. Spencer, Jen, and Jen's mother and father have a showdown at the end, which concludes whether or not Mr. Kornfeldt has been involved in the attempts on their lives. TOPICS TO TALK ABOUT How some professions require one to lead a double life. Truth in marriage. Family secrets. VIOLENCE Spencer kicks a gun out of a henchman's hand, gets into some brief fisticuffs with him, before grabbing the guy and tossing both himself and the man off the boat and into the water. Spencer blows up a helicopter via remote. It is unclear how many people were onboard. Spencer elbows a man, who has just insulted Jen, hard in the face. Henry reveals that he is actually an assassin. He first pulls a knife on Spencer and slashes a container of milk that he is holding. They then fight, with Henry lunging with his knife and Spencer using a large spoon to ward off the attack. Once the knife is out of Henry's hand, the two then have a fairly violent fight with multiple punches thrown and kicks executed. Henry grabs Spencer several times and tosses him about. The fight thrashes Spencer and Jen's kitchen and an adjoining room. Spencer eventually tries to run upstairs, but Henry tackles him. They wrestle on the steps and break a banister. Jen comes home and obeys Spencer when he implores to go up to their room and retrieve a gun. As the two men continue to struggle, Jen follows Spencer's order to shoot Henry, which she does in the arm. As Spencer interrogates Henry, he jabs his gun into Henry's bullet wound at least twice. Multiple bullets are shot into Spencer and Jen's house from an unseen assassin, forcing them to flee. Spencer and Jen hop into their SUV and drive through their garage door and tear off through the neighborhood. Henry and Spencer exchange gunfire during a car chase that thrashes a good part of their suburban neighborhood. Henry wields an Uzi-like machine gun, while Spencer returns fire with his handgun. Spencer ultimately crashes his larger vehicle into Henry's vintage Trans Am, sending the car careening into a ditch and killing the hitman (we don't see his body, though). Spencer and Jen find Holbrook's corpse with bloody bullet wounds in the chest and head. Vivian wields a gun as she tries to kill Spencer at his office. They engage in some violent, hand-to-hand combat that sees Vivian kicking and punching Spencer martial-arts style. Spencer punches back and, at one point, picks Vivian up and pile-drives her into a table. Jen tries to shoot Vivian, but can't figure out the safety on the gun. While wrestling, Spencer is able to free his gun hand and shoot a chandelier made of deer antlers which then comes loose from the ceiling and impales Vivian, killing her. A delivery man pulls out a machine gun and fires multiple rounds in Spencer's direction in an attempt to kill him. Spencer is able to punch the man and barely run to cover. The man is then run over by Olivia in her car, killing him. Olivia then tries to run down Spencer. Jen, though, smashes her vehicle into Olivia's. Spencer then shoots what looks like a propane tank behind Olivia's SUV, blowing her and the vehicle up. Lily tries to run Jen and Spencer down with her car while Mac attempts to shoot them with his high-powered rifle while perched on a nearby hill. Lily drives hard through backyards, mowing down multiple fences in trying to kill the two only to eventually crash the vehicle. Lily and Mac track Spencer and Jen to their house. They shoot up Spencer's closet. When they enter the closet, Spencer jumps down from hanging on the ceiling. He kicks Mac, shoots Lily, and then breaks Mac's neck. Mr. Kornfeldt shoots and kills Kristen, who had been holding his wife and Jen at gunpoint. He then shoots the presumed-dead Lily who tried to sneak up behind Spencer and shoot him. Reviewed June 4, 2010 / Posted June 4, 2010

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